Weekly Thoughts #55: My Son Has Returned!
My son has returned. My dell computer is fixed. I have to stop with these titles because some be thinking I’m talking about humans but that’s me always playing. I needed him. Some good news because lately, things have been falling apart. I think last week I forgot to mention I had to bury my PS4. God, I’m talking about items breaking. I am spoiled.
I completed my dream spoken word. I have had this spoken word that I wrote almost 3 years ago called freeze. I always dreamed of creating and releasing it but been saving it for the Dream album. But with everything going on I just felt like the perfect time is now. I Mentioned a lot about it in Let’s talk about it black man. So anyways I just made it the other night and have been smiling ever since. I have been sending it to people all around me because I just want to hear feedback.
I want to release it but I want a video done. That’s a real Dream right there. I’m going to be wishing upon a star for a long time thinking about that one. The story line paints a picture that I wish I can show you but I probably won’t.
I have been going days trying to buy a beat for another spoken word. If only I could make my own beats I would be set. But I don’t and once I can purchase this beat I will be able to post-war zone. A poem I wrote after the recent events. I just want to share my thoughts. I don’t want to put it on streaming platforms. But I do want to make it available everywhere. I wish I can make the proceeds go to the BLM movement.
Have you all been protesting? I wanted to but these videos online have kept me in THE HOUSE. It seems like the peaceful ones are met with violence. Even an old man wasn’t safe from them. You think this 6’3 big beautiful black man is about to become an innocent bystander hit by some tear gas or one of them big ass rubber bullets. That are supposed to bounce off the ground and hit its target but instead has been used like regular bullets as the feds shoot people in the face with it. Nonetheless I think the fuck not. Kidding, but some truth to it. But hey I’ll still protest from the sidelines. I applaud anyone who protests and will sign every petition regarding Black Lives Matter. We all have a voice and can use it in many different ways.
Speaking of BLM I feel like a hypocrite. I was one that didn’t understand it at first. But I get it now, somewhat. I was one who would say how do black lives only matter when the skin color change or they are a cop. I still feel that way but I feel like bringing up black on black crimes kinda protest another protest. Hold on, I think I confused myself. Saying Black Lives Matter then bringing up black on black crimes kind of excuses one’s action. Do you understand what I’m saying?
That’s the end of this week’s weekly Thoughts. I hope we can find a conclusion to these protests. On one hand, you want things to go back to normal but our normal is toxic. It’s a certain toxic that not all of us feel or see on a daily. I can’t speak for white Americans or any other race. But as a black man, I don’t feel safe when I see cops, I feel like I’m about to die. I only feel this way because a lot of people have been killed on and off camera by someone wearing a badge. It’s crazy to see how many stories coming out about these officers. It’s crazier to think I’m not even surprised. What’s done in the dark will eventually come into the light.
Yeah that’s that. I hope to see you all next week. Sign some petitions to help these cases get reopened and see some justice finally. Link below.